2011/12 Note: Still the same weird guy.
I get a lot of opinions about who I am. Most of it is “you’re weird”. That’s it. I never blame people for what they think, because I do behave weird at times. It’s not something I do on purpose, since who wants to be weird?
First of all, I am considered to have weird thoughts. I just go by this way. My mind is distorted, twisted, whatever, but I function like this. If I were to be normal, it’d be boring. Does the world need another average joe? No, but a weird joe makes up for some interest, or hate. Hey, people hate or like me, but either way, I’m a distraction.
Second, I am pretty blunt. Whenever I talk, depending on location and environment, I just curse and bring those dark thoughts people have, but never really say. Sometimes, it’s offensive but at least I shy away from those harsh racial slurs. No n-word basically. Some people can’t tolerate this. Not my fault, as it’s just how I am.
Third, some people I know consider me as being “gay”. Well, I think I’m further off the gay charts than them. Reason for me being gay: I don’t talk to girls. Personally, I just have nothing to talk to girls about, but it gets irritating when they see me talk to a female and go “oh, who’s your girlfriend?” If it were funny, I’d laugh along. But it’s lame. I prefer to talk to everyone. I don’t really care who they are, as it’s just interesting to talk to others, not only the same people over and over. So for this gay issue, fuck it. Right now, I have different priorities. When I’m well enough on my own, I’ll start finding someone. I hate how people try to tell me what to do, just because they want a girlfriend. You see how teenagers are. It’s either love or death. Generalizing, but that’s about it.
Lastly, these types of opinions turn people away, I assume. I am considered opinionated by a few, and well, I can’t change that either. I always have thoughts to go against something. I can go on and on with an issue, which may bore, change, or anger people. That’s how I am.
I’m no different than anyone else. I might not like hanging out everyday with people, but people can’t consider that as having “no life”. I’m not into the “social life” thing, where all I would do is spend money, watch movies about men thrusting their ass (nothing less gay huh?), or talk about pointless shit. Not my idea of fun, really. Narrow-minded assholes insist that this is being “socially active”, but that’s a rant for another day. People don’t accept me actually being myself, too bad. If I let them tell me what to do, I’ll never make it anywhere.
I like being different. It makes people go “what the hell is wrong with him?” and I get a little smirk on my face.