What the hell are the Smurfs?

I didn’t grow up in the era of Smurfs, during the better years of cartoon shows. My era was the Pokemon creeps, Yu-gi-oh freaks, and Spongebob Rapepants. Not that I oppose any of these cartoons, but it’s creepy to see a 40-year old man dressed as Pikachu, especially when he screams “Pika Pi!”.

I know vaguely what Smurfs are. They’re little blue dudes that are considered to be castrated. They parade around, singing songs and solving problems. Some connect the Smurfs with communism, but not being a viewer of the show, I wouldn’t know. But I see how it’s possible from Wikipedia, as the Smurfs are written in this little fantasy land. Yes, I trust Wiki for this type of information, because it is well-protected by fanboys.

So in my age, the Smurfs are depicted as weird little dudes based on a few reasons. One is that there are basically no girl smurfs. Smurfette can’t be considered as a slut, since there’s actually three female smurfs: Smurfette, Sassette, and Nanny. Unfair to judge Smurfette without a fair trial onto the other women. I always though Smurfette was the only one to grope to in their little world, as will many other kids. Sad no one reads up though. Do Smurfs have sexual relations? I’m not sure if they even have genitals. But if the dudes did, it’d be reasonable for the little blues to do any one of these three woman, as their urges will greatly overpower morality. “The end justifies the means”, and the actions of male Smurfs would be justified through primal urges. Not that I support them, but seriously, they gotta do what’s needed to survive. I don’t want to go further for this issue, because whether Smurfs reproduce sexually or asexually, I wouldn’t watch it.

Another thing I hear about is the language of the Smurfs. They use words like “smurftastic” and “We’re going smurfing today”. Hard to understand what the hell “smurfing” means. Imagine a world built on this: “Hey, what smurf is it?” “Buy these smurfs at the smurf today” I may be incorrect, but the word “smurf” is basically a noun or verb, covering a variety of uses. Interesting concept of language.

That is all I know or researched about the little Smurfs. That communism issue turned me away, and who knew there was Smurf erotica on the web.

In the end of the post, I learned nothing new about the Smurfs. The general idea is still “little weird blue dudes”, and will be for years. I’l teach my kids this. There isn’t anything else to shock me with, unless they prove that Smurfs are real. Hope you enjoyed this nonsense into some Smurf facts.

Oh look, a Smurf is waving good-bye. Or hello.

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